Moody
Well it's too early for PMS, but good lord do I feel like I have it. I was going to say I'm not sure why, but I guess all I'd have to do is go back and read my blog to see that life hasn't been super lately. Funny how good we sometimes can be at forgetting the causes even while we experience the effects.
I try to remind myself that it could be worse. This worked well for me in the Fall when I'd have an attack of people hating moodiness. I'd think about the massive regional devastation and the staggering personal loss people suffered from the hurricanes in the Gulf Coast and all of my shit seemed pretty damned small. Unfortunately, right now thinking about anything like this makes me more bummed out and cranky though. My reaction starts and ends with something like "...What the fuck is wrong with people?"
I think I need to take some time to sit down and seriously count my blessings. I'm not one of those "focus on the positive" types of people. I just can't be. It is completely against my nature. I don't always see only the negative - I'm not a pessimist. I was judged too cheerful for my goth friends when I was younger. However, I've come to learn that I am the kind of person who, if life gives me lemons, turns them into projectiles to hurl back at life.
3 comments:
Oh, do I ever understand where you're coming from right now. I get awfully damn tired of having to be the upbeat one too - you know me. It ain't easy.
And last summer, when gas prices were skyrocketing for some stupid reason or another (Bush and his cronies never have enough money) and everybody was saying "What are you complaining about? Be glad you don't live in New Orleans!" I thought that rationalization was as unrealistic as it is today. Just because your shit isn't on the scale of a national disaster doesn't mean it's less shitty. Plus, your shit is all YOURS.
Do we need to remember to be thankful for small things? Of course! Healthy family members, enough food to eat, clothing to wear, someplace to live, etc. But when the shit in our personal lives hits the fan, it's no fun. Allow yourself your very own reaction.
Something *is* wrong with people. Count your blessings and feel free to be bummed out and cranky without adding guilt to the list.
Man, I miss you!
♥
Life for all of us is full of ups & downs. I'm sure its only a matter of time before life turns super for you, I hope so.
Yes indeedy! Thanks guys.
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