Waaaaaaaa

Today I think I've earned a visit from the WAMBULANCE.
Go on. Click it. You know you want to (make sure you're speakers are on for full effect and you may have to hit reload to get the "siren" to work properly).

I woke up irritable. I think it is the Meclizine. I know this shit makes me cranky from when I've had to take it in the past, which is mercifully infrequently.

After having vertigo all day Friday, by Friday night, I decided I'd force my brain to adapt to it. There is perhaps a chance that this was not a great idea. I lay on the bed, determined I was going to work my way out of being dizzy. "I'll show that fucking vestibular system!" I thought as I rolled my head from side to side, stopping for a few minutes on each side after the room had stablized.

A___ showed up after I had given up, while I was sitting on the edge of the bed staring into the wood grain of the closet door and trying not to feel nauseous. I hate being sick in the company of others, and I felt like I had just stupidly made myself sicker, so I took some (more) meclizine. And kept taking it most of the day Saturday. On the plus side, I'm not so dizzy now. On the down side, I've been moody all weekend.

I've been trying not to be irritable, or to remind myself that it is the drug and not the world so I don't react to every little thing.

I'm not doing such a good job with that goal. I had a fight with A___ already today and I've only been up for about an hour. I know how it started. I could see it coming, but there was no legitimate way around it that I could gracefully execute. I was like an angry cat that had slipped down into the pillowcase while the owners were trying to give it a pill. Rrrwowr-hiss-scratch - all of which was mostly just me fighting with myself.