In the course of looking for some content for my class - because you know, I think the students deserve at least that much - I ran across this
dialect survey. One of the survey questions was "
What do you call the gooey or dry matter that collects in the corners of your eyes, especially while you are sleeping?"

Turns out "sleep" was well liked by a sizable proportion of respondents (37.78%). The next largest group preference (10.68%) was for the childishly gross "eye booger". However, my personal favorite term was "eye shit", which accounted for .45% of the responses and was distributed as in the map above (yellow points).
I find it strangely comforting that "eye shit" had a showing at all. It's not a conscious distain for the whimsy underlying more popular terms like "sleepy seed" (1.67%) or "sand" (7.77%). It's just that sometimes I go through periods where am seized with a very strong urge to dispense with the verbal frippery.
Or maybe I'm just, at heart, a
true vulgarian.
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